How To Stop Saying “I Hate Marketing”
Over the 11 years that I’ve worked with small business owners and creators I often hear this phrase: “I hate marketing.” or “marketing isn’t working for me.” The latter I hear a lot right now.
I get it. Social media has made us all feel bad in one way or another. From not doing enough to not being enough, it feels endless. There’s also a ton of marketing that just plain sucks and feels super gross. But there’s also a lot more people out there making it work for themselves and showing others how to market with integrity.
The reality is if you want to run a successful business or even a side gig you have to market yourself and put yourself out there. There’s no way around it. Disliking or disengaging with something that propels our businesses forward doesn’t serve us, it just holds us back.
I personally love marketing. When done right, I love to be marketed and sold to. I do! I can’t lie. Maybe it’s because I cut my teeth in retail. But I think it’s really because marketing - again when done right - is a creative expression. At least that’s how I choose to approach it.
In my experience, most people who are running small businesses and feel cringy about marketing themselves may need to change their perspective. When I first started, I hated marketing too! It made me feel awkward and empty. Especially email marketing.
I didn’t want to “annoy” people. Then one day after lots of work around trying not to feel this way my mindset changed. I chose to accept marketing for what it truly is: an opportunity to share what I sell with people that need it and want it.
You believe in what you do and create, right? And you feel excited about it, correct?
What if instead of looking at marketing as gross or tacky you looked at it as a way to get what you offer in front of people that really need it? People that can benefit from it? People that are actually looking for it? People that actually want it?
Marketing is sharing your message and connecting the right people to something they want/need. That’s all it is.
It can be as gross as you want it to be. It’s a choice. Marketing is sharing what you do and how you do it and what it will do for others. It’s sharing your strengths and gifts. And that’s a good thing. It never ever has to feel gross. That means you also don’t have to engage in shitty marketing ploys ever.
It's easy to get locked into thinking something doesn't work for your small business, especially if it represents an entire industry we're taught to despise like marketing. We’ve been raised in a culture that surrounds us with selling things we often don’t need to change things that don’t need to be fixed. We’ve come to despise this because it really is a con.
It doesn’t have to be the same way for our own businesses. It simply doesn’t. We have options on how we allow things to exist within our lives. We have the power to run things as we see fit. We can choose to approach marketing differently. Marketing for us doesn't have to include scarcity copy, fear mongering, or underhanded bait and switch tactics that don't deliver.
What I find so powerful about owning one’s business is that you get to make up the rules and how they work for you. You get to call out bullshit and be a leader. Obviously, there are basic and complex things every business owner must do to grow their business. That’s a fact. But there is wiggle room to own your integrity when it comes to it. You don’t have to be a giant fake asshole when it comes to selling. You can own and make your marketing unique to you and your business and your integrity. None of these things are mutually exclusive.
That Special Sauce: YOU.
There are many, many ways to market one’s business. And there is definitely a way to market your business in a way that feels true to you and truly SERVES your clients. What makes each marketing plan unique, different, and valuable is your voice and the product you offer. That’s what sets your marketing apart and can make it truly special.
There is never going to be a magic hack or a magic bullet to make you millions of dollars. We know this. Growing a successful sustainable business takes hard work as well as that special sauce that only you own: what you offer.
Marketing is an entire experience. It never stops and there’s nothing wrong with this. Finding peace with marketing now will set you free from an anxiety that serves no one.
If talking about your business doesn’t feel good, I encourage you to examine why. Marketing can and might definitely feel gross, especially if you aren’t used to it. But the more you believe in yourself and the results you offer, the less gross it should feel.
Once you start to experience that people want to buy what you’re selling, you’ll see how important (and fun!) marketing can be. You’re not swindling people. You’re selling them something you have bet your whole life on: your services.
6 Things to Consider in Your Marketing
Consistency
The number one issue I see with small businesses is that they’re under a social media mind meld. I’ve seen this since I started my business in 2012, it never seems to change.
Many people believe that posting a few times about their services on social media should be bringing in the bucks. Then when it doesn’t they think they’re *doing it wrong*. Nope. This happens because they see large accounts posting once a year and wonder why they can’t do the same. When in reality all of those accounts have massive paid social running in the background.
Social media is only part of the equation, it’s just a tool in your marketing strategy. If you’re not communicating with your audience about who you are, what you do, and what you offer consistently, then you are in trouble. Whether it’s organic social, paid social, email marketing, networking, podcasting, blogging, etc. consistency is always key.
Determine Where to Focus Your Efforts.
The marketing landscape has changed dramatically over the last few years. A lot of what worked, doesn’t anymore. That doesn’t mean things won’t work across the board. You need a clear strategy of where you want to focus your efforts. Like I said above, marketing isn’t just social media.
Decide where your audience is and focus there for at the very least 90 days. And as above, be consistent. While I know social media can help a lot of businesses, I’ve found time and time again that where marketing works best for me is in community building and networking. This happens in comments for me and in connecting with people in various ways off social. Get in front of individuals through podcasts, memberships, workshops (online and off), masterminds, email marketing, here on Substack, FB Groups, reach out to individuals that you have worked with and ask for referrals, start an affiliate program, etc.
Relationship Building = Trust
Consistency and showing up in your audience’s inbox and elsewhere builds relationships and in the long run can and will build trust.
While showing up is key that doesn’t mean ALWAYS selling. It means offering real value, learning about your audience, knowing what they truly need from you, and how you can best serve them. Not disappearing from their lives until you have something to sell. Give back - you don’t get to where you want to go in a vacuum. No one likes a social climber - be of service and help people.
Sharing what you know your audience wants to hear and building a relationship with them is imperative to having a marketing strategy you love being involved with. Why? Because people RESPOND to you and then share your stuff and buy from you. There is nothing bad about this. You are selling something, not trying to make friends. (Although I will say that many of my followers and clients have become friends, and that is something I truly value.). You’re also not selling out. Please, for the love of God, rid that thought from your head.
Confidence
There’s a lot of talk online about faking it until you make it, and that’s helpful to push through any uncomfortable feelings about marketing initially. But it’s not about actually faking it. It’s about:
Doing the work
Figuring out what feels right to you
Seeing the results
Continuing to do what works
This cycle builds confidence. It’s a call and response and it is integral to building your confidence and your business.
I didn’t get better at what I do until I started to pay attention to what was working and kept trying. When I realized I started to know what I was doing and people were responding that made me feel really good. Your mileage may vary but I can tell you that you won’t gain confidence if you stay stuck in thinking about things (analysis paralysis).
Get moving. Start talking about what you are doing. Build in public. Send people to your website often.
Nothing builds confidence faster than connecting with people who respond to what you have to say and then pay you for it. It’s pretty great.
Measure, Iterate, and Double Down
Not everything is going to work. A lot will not work. That will happen. There will be things that work really well and things that fall totally flat. Things you think are going to be a hit, then it’s crickets. That’s just business. It doesn’t mean you’re a failure. Staying nimble and flexible in your business is key to growing and making more money. This means fighting the mind gremlins that tell you this is about you.
I mean, it might be about your product or service. If you are consistently not making sales - I don’t mean consistently making sales, big difference here - then you need to look at what’s going on. It might be your message. It might be your offer.
Track everything: sales, traffic, clicks, open rates. Then analyze what worked, what didn’t, where there are trends, etc. Pay attention to what people respond to. Ask people that follow you what they want to see more of.
When something fails, take a good hard, honest look, and ask yourself what you can learn from this. And when things do work? DO THE EXACT SAME THING: take a good hard, honest look, and ask yourself what you can learn from this!
Consent
Most people who hate marketing, hate it because of experiences they’ve had - no one likes to be sold to if they don’t want to be sold to. This is where consent based marketing comes in, and it’s crucial. I also truly believe we can be leaders in changing how people view small business marketing.
People who signed up for your email list (signed up being the operative phrase here) want to hear from you. People that follow you on social media want to hear from you.
If you engage in consent based marketing you have nothing to stress about when it comes to “annoying” people, because they want to be there.
Final Thoughts
If you believe in what you do, I encourage you to embrace marketing in a way that works for you. We get to decide what it looks like and how it feels. Make it your own. Pay attention to marketing you respond to and why. Then test that. What lights you up? Do more of it.
Marketing isn’t something you can skimp on in your business. You may have time here and there to take a break, but overall it’s a crucial part of your business that determines how successful you are.
So what’s it going to be? Are you going to continue hating on something that helps you grow or are you going to nurture something you love?
It’s up to you.
All of the above screenshots were taken from Threads from people I follow and admire for their advice and what they do. They all live in integrity when it comes to marketing. Follow them: @joanwestenberg; @hazelq; @sharonzjewelry; @thatalliemason; @damajue
